Locked in my own head?

April 7, 2013

Something that should be addressed in the case of having a disease is the affect on others around the person with the illness. A disease is something that affects not only the person with the illness but it touches the people around them. Something that I hadn’t thought about earlier because I was so involved with the daily difficulties of having MS. The disease is having an affect on the people I love most: my husband, my son, even my mother.
For example, my husband had envisioned a retirement playing golf and traveling with me. He has expressed the loss he feels in not being able to anticipate this any longer.
As for my son, the issue of grandchildren comes up. Not being able to use my hands means I can’t touch my grandchild’s cheek, rub his/her fuzzy little head or tickle his/her toes the way most grandparents might. I can only hope to rub noseys, kiss their chubby cheeks and play “buttered elbows”.
My mother, who is 89 years old and has experienced everything (born in Germany in the 20’s) can’t hear me very well and I can’t speak loudly enough for her. All of this serves as a reminder that having this disease can contribute to burying ones’ self within, hence my main point in blogging – – to break out of my self-confinement and reach out to anyone who may be experiencing something similar.
I would add the following: I think it’s easier to experience this myself rather than watch it happen to someone I love. So, I would imagine that for my loved ones to watch me go down hill physically must be rather painful. I just know that it would be very difficult to watch my loved ones deteriorate physically. Any suggestions or comments would be appreciated. What do you think?…

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